Very positive news
Sketch: Its female happiness
Each person in life has one purpose – to become happy. In what look the happiness wouldn’t be represented – in wealth, glory, children, friendship. The way choice depends on a choice of the purpose also. But sometimes, having reached something one, we miss much another, important and necessary, and after we try to make up and time left. And nevertheless such women who any inexplicably are able to combine the incongruous meet. One of such unique women – the known Kazakhstan businessman Marusya Maralovna Asaubayeva. To the anniversary Marusya Maralovna Assaubayev published the book “Pages of My Happiness” which, in fact, is the textbook for the young girls only entering adult independent life. To learn to be rich it is necessary at rich, to learn to be healthy it is necessary at healthy, to learn to be happy it is necessary at happy. So in what a secret of female happiness? We will look through book pages together.
Meeting under the sign of destiny
The eighteen-anniversary is a boundary behind which the childhood comes to an end. To us both it is frightening, and it is interesting, what there behind the horizon? … We make plans which are simply obliged to be carried out. But why a half of them and remains projects?
In the 18th birthday and Marusya asked questions: what person I will become, what benefit I will be able to bring the affairs? It possesses remarkable forces and helps the weak. Whether it will suffice to become happy?
Marusya studied at pharmacological faculty, married off girlfriends and didn’t reflect at all on the device of the private life. Therefore didn’t allocate none of the guys who have come to it to birthday. The Rope was the only thing who drew its special attention, but on it already there were hunters.
And the Rope began to come to Marusya to a hostel, to invite at cinema and to concerts. Then already he admitted that noticed it on the first course. But, it is visible, destiny to them was intended to go on life hand in hand because on combination of circumstances the Rope which was going to be transferred to the Moscow higher education institution, refused at the last minute a trip.
On the Rope many girls and when Marusya had a car accident admired, she mentally already said goodbye to darling – why to it the invalid, when nearby such girls. And the Rope came every day to it to hospital, despite Marusya’s ban. She wanted to frighten off it the whims, and it carried out them resignedly. And so – 2 months and 10 days. Then Marusya understood that more reliably and more responsibly than the guy she hardly will meet in the life. The foundation of big, happy love of the Rope and Marusya was so laid.
After the termination of the Rope institute I put before it the ultimatum: “Or you marry me, or I in the direction go to other regions”. And she also didn’t think of the family relations, doubted, whether will be able to conform to its high requirements. But the Rope was sure that she will be the good wife.
“In everything I recognized its superiority resignedly. Though realized that without having married yet me, it already accustoms to the orders”.
The first mistake which is made by the young wives who have entered a new family, – attempt to separate from relatives of the husband. And on it they have the answer: “I looked for the husband, instead of the mother-in-law”. But without mutual understanding, support from relatives of the husband the young family is doomed to quarrels, partings, divorce. Marusya understood it early therefore it tried to be pleasant to relatives of the Rope, to make friends with them. It was given a cordial welcome by the grandmother Kanata, the father favourably met. Marusya Maral’s father though was afflicted first that his favourite baby bird departs from why nests, but the end was put by mother Kalamkas: “The daughter marries, it is the nature law. Happiness of the girl behind that threshold which she crossed”.
Marusya got to a kind family, to it helped, her supported, surrounded with care and heat, and she paid to new relatives in the same coin. With what heat Marusya Maralovna remembers today both the grandmother, and mother, both the father, and sisters brothers of the Rope… She admires wisdom of the parents who didn’t climb with morals in a young family, didn’t try to draw a blanket on itself.
“The daughter Makosh, – loving wise mother wrote her, – “A rope you found itself, now respect and appreciate the husband, don’t offend his brothers and sisters. About us don’t worry! Know that the married daughter is already the stranger in a home, be happy there where you came. Become for them the loved one. Respect his parents. Упаси My God to us to hear that we incorrectly brought up you”.
The mother’s order became for Marusya a guiding star to which she follows nearly 4 tens years.
Their family wellbeing began with “tumble-down house” in Alma-Ata. The rope worked, Marusya continued study. On Marusya’s memoirs, I came it is time to prove that she is the real woman. It became clear that much the girl isn’t able.
“The rope happened to try the first all my experimental dishes: and fish soup with an unextracted gall bladder, both fat-prezhirny pilaf, and the head of a ram with an undivided jaw… “.
When the first son Bauyrzhan was born, the young family had no permanent address, there was no money. Pregnancy was complicated by Marusya’s illness, it caught hepatitis, went to infectious diseases hospital. As Marusya risk didn’t frighten off the husband to catch, the Rope came every day. Bauyrzhan was born before New year. Young parents had no experience, at first Marusya even was afraid to bathe the kid. But it was necessary to get it together and to learn to be careful mother.
There was time. The rope worked at Kazmekhanobr institute, Marusya studied, Bauyrzhan went to kindergarten. After a while the Rope decided to arrive in postgraduate study. To them representatives of administration of institute home came, offered the 4-hkomnatny apartment, a high salary if only the Rope remained. The rope provided to the wife the right to make the decision. After all as though he wanted to continue study, the family needed normal living conditions. The casting vote at that moment belonged to the woman. Marusya felt skin as the beloved husband strained, and she blurted out:
– “Us money doesn’t interest. Where it will be interesting to it, there and we will work”.
“I am sure that the Rope waited from me for these words. My trust inspired it, inspired for new work”.
Marusya settled in a drugstore for a salary of 60 rubles, by the way, having worked on one place of 20 years. The rope ended postgraduate study, wrote the master’s thesis, worked in bank.
“Soon we received the one-room apartment on the sixth floor – for us it was huge pleasure. I remember how it from bank brought the first salary. I for the first time held such quantity of money in hand and remembered how divided cutlets into four parts and mixed with fried potato that food it seemed more”.
Soon one more miracle – the little son Aydar was born. The rope returned to institute the senior teacher. In June, 1985 the Rope defended the doctoral dissertation. After a while he was appointed the dean of faculty, in August of the 86th there was their younger son Sanzhar. Now the family moved to the two-room apartment.
Now young families don’t want to give birth to children, justifying housing problems, financial difficulties. Therefore it is necessary to admire Asaubayev’ family. Cutlet divided into four parts, but to children gave birth. Lived in the one-room apartment and brought up three sons. Worked and defended dissertations. Thus managed never in life to swear, not to break any plate, not to leave in a huff. Their family happiness didn’t depend neither on a housing quadrature, nor on monetary stocks, the main value – love and respect. If there is no love, patience, respect, the family is doomed to destruction even in the crystal lock.
Not commander, and second mother
All our tests and deprivations are rewarded from above. A certain prosperity
came. Boys grew in Asaubayev’ family healthy and clever. But it is impossible to tell that with them there were no problems. But here wise grandfathers and grandmothers helped. Everything should be overcome: both awkward age, and the conflicts at school, and childish pranks. But not for nothing speak: wisdom of mother in relation to children goes from her heart. Children whom love, bad won’t grow up.
And then reorganization, the sovereignty, market economy burst. Marusya Maralovna opened a private drugstore. Later Marusya Maralovna Kanat’s husband Shaykhanovich was connected to business also. Forgot about holidays, studied new business. Now their enterprise is visited by foreign delegations, recognition of the international industrial elite came. Children had an opportunity to study abroad.
And nevertheless Marusya Maralovna considers as the main merit creation of a big close-knit family which today enter the daughter-in-law and grandsons.
Relationship in a young family in many respects depends on how relatives of the new member will apprehend. How many families broke up from intervention of mothers-in-law and mothers-in-law. Marusya Maralovna always with gratitude remembered relatives of the husband, and tried to adopt their wisdom and patience. Time came, and her boys grew up, reflected on creation of the families. Now as the mother-in-law Marusya Maralovna had to act. She perfectly understood that any mother has a feeling of some jealousy to the son. The boy to whom you gave birth, I brought up, I left, cuts an umbilical cord and starts twisting the nest where there will be rules, orders, tastes. The main thing that having gemmated, children didn’t lose related touches with the earth, them grown up. Marusya Maralovna from the very first days tried to surround with care and support the snokh.
“Happiness of the young – in their own hands, and we won’t regret anything that on us will depend, – financial support, moral support. Our task – creation of conditions in order that they ended study and lived in happiness. Hard it is a task – to bring up a floret from other garden and to achieve that it didn’t lose the beauty and aroma, and I blossomed, as before, or perhaps even better”.
Probably, thanking and to Marusya Maralovna’s diligence, families of her sons are amicable among themselves, and grandsons consider aunts as the best friends, the daughter-in-law treat her as to native mother. So everything intertwined in this big close-knit family.
“Difficulties always were and is in life of everyone. For the years I understood that alone not to cope with troubles, they can be overcome only together: with the husband wife, with children, with relatives and friends. And at the head there has to be a person clever, kind, talented and given rise to be the leader”.
As true east woman, Marusya Maralovna means the husband dear to it of the Rope of Shaykhanovich.
Indeed speak, it is necessary to study happiness at the happy.